(Originally posted Wednesday, February 20, 2008 )
A repertoire of facial expressions worn by American Idol contestants during competition:
The game face
The Jim Morrison “I know what color your underwear is” scowl
The “I’ve got pitch problems” smirk
The Joan of Arc “I’m literally burning to death” mask of pain
The anal penetration eye pop
The “this performance sucks” grimace
The toothy idiot sneer
The “I’m dying over here” grin
The roadkill surprise
The Liz Phair “I’m a naughty little girl” blow job face
The veil of tears
The sooty bronchitis blue mask
The Colombian necktie
The eyeless carapace of death
Beauty is Imperfection 
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