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Salon de la Guerre’s latest album, Fire Regime, has just hit the streaming services, and it’s an album of acoustic guitar songs, some folky and some poppy.

Every couple of years I find it’s worthwhile to get away from my Midi software and electronics and try writing simple songs on a guitar the way my ’60s folk heroes did. Changing the style up and going back and forth among mediums keeps me creative so I never run out of ideas. If I’ve got nothing in my head. I just let my hands start strumming stuff, and my body remembers what my head has temporarily forgotten how to do.

And while it would be pretty silly to think of me as a people pleaser (check out how often I change music styles and how detrimental that it is to my fan base building) I do have a few friends and confidants who simply like my acoustic guitar stuff better. And so in the interest of fan service, I like giving them something they’ll enjoy every couple of years.

I had different ambitions for this project—my original plan was to weave electronic arpeggios from my software into my John Fahey-style guitar tunes. But the results of these lab experiments were iffy and I decided to instead get out of the way and let the songs just be what they wanted to be in their purest form.

My acoustic guitar albums are also the only projects on which I write lyrics first. In other words, I write poetry and then I write music around it, something I could not do until fairly recently. When I saw Bob Dylan do it in the movie Don’t Look Back, I was in awe. How do you write a guitar part around an existing verse and meter, especially something emotionally complicated, while keeping the song moving along and keeping the listener hypnotized? It took me years to feel comfortable writing that way.

Lyrically, the new songs are kind of dark, as they always tend to get for some reason when I pull out my trusty dreadnought. I usually conjure up dark characters that I might otherwise slap into my fiction and let them speak their deluded truths. They are often people seeking some sort of spiritual plain to reach even as they toil in the worst of human muck and give in to their basest desires. At least that’s my take when I read these lyrics back and try to figure out what I meant.

This is Salon de la Guerre’s 48th album, and contains my 600th composition. If you’re in a fact-checking mode, you can go to Bandcamp and count (and thank you for your due diligence).

You can now listen to Fire Regime on Apple Music, Amazon, Spotify, YouTube and Bandcamp, among other services. I hope you enjoy it. Here’s a sample:

… is going to come out in a couple or three weeks. It’s called Fire Regime, and it’s my latest album of acoustic guitar tunes.

A couple of important milestones here: This is not only Salon de la Guerre’s 48th album; it also contains my 600th copyrighted song. If you’re in a due diligence/fact-checking mode, you can indeed go count these on my Bandcamp page.

The latest album is a mix of upbeat, poppy numbers and John Fahey-style fingerpicking songs. I’m excited to share them with you! Watch this space for updates.

–*Parade notes that hot girl in photo also dead.

–*Sylvia Plath is done with black shoes this spring.

–*This alien inhabited a man with massive credit card debt, instantly regretted it.

–*Why you’re being possessed by the devil all wrong.

–*This fruit salad hack will have you mainly just sitting eating a melon.

–*This new AI wastes time for you.

–*New AI replaces Great Replacement Theory theorist.

–*Why Hollywood won’t hire Walter Matthau anymore.

–*This 12-stepper made amends about past bad behavior. “Gee, that sounded a lot like bragging to me,” said friend.

–*“I thought we all agreed we were telling Grandma this was a spa.”

–*Bet you wish you knew where that phone charger went.

–*American hubris destroyed by recent discovery of strained piriformis muscle.

–*Americans have microplastics on the brain.

–*Why our dick jokes sound less funny when we’re explaining them to Human Resources.

–*“I’ll never do that again,” becomes biggest American catchphrase of 2026

–*“You act like I don’t exist,” complains leprechaun in today’s op-ed.

–*You won’t be surprised at all at what happened when we put three control freaks together in a small storage closet 

–*“Say it louder!” Man shamed by pundits for mumbling his marriage proposal on Disney tram

–*“It’s a subacute unit, not a champagne room.” America’s elderly physical rehab suite roommates are not keeping quiet any longer.

–*Man apologizes to daughter for years of bad behavior that he mainly acted out in an unpublished novel. “I don’t remember that happening, Dad.”

–*American asexuals cannot think of any policy initiatives they want to pursue at this time.

–*American moms say you’re not going to find a parking spot any closer than that one. “We could use the walk anyway.”

–*New age of gender fluidity and shifting of sexual identity categories causes grave anxiety among aging transvestites.

–*With everything going on right now … and you suggest a Hawaiian pizza?

–*Why that car in your driveway can tip people off to your net worth and that picture of you with a dead deer can tip people off to your party affiliation.

–*Why three lines about what the Cindy Brady actress is doing today will like suffice for most of us.

–*Child existentialist rolls rock up hill over and over.

–*”All of us will be hated after we’re dead anyway.” A Trump voter waxes philosophical amid Iran bombing.

You can read a review of my latest album Carnival at the website Pitch Perfect. The author, Dino DiMuro, has reviewed me in the past and I’m always keen to hear his insights.

As I’ve said previously, this is the album where I played drums for the first time, which I feel gave more dimension to the songs.

You can download the album at Apple Music or stream it on Spotify or YouTube. All told, this is my 47th album and I now count almost 600 songs in the Salon de la Guerre catalogue. If you haven’t heard albums like Betrayed and Resting Horse Face and Standing Close To Power you’re missing out!

I am pleased to say that the website BookLife has reviewed my most recent novel, The Silly Dreams of Shallow Sleep, the continuing story of porn star turned private investigator Angel Bimini, who was first introduced to the world in my 2019 novel Zip Monkey. The novel follows Angel as she looks into the death of a famous cancer researcher. The official cause of death was suicide, but his ex-partner, a famous immunologist, insists that they had run afoul of Chinese spies looking into a disease cure they had found.

The book life reviewer says, “Rasmussen’s writing is rich and evocative, blending sharp wit with poignant observations about human nature, and the characters are deeply flawed yet compelling, each grappling with their own demons and desires.”

I will accept that compliment!

For now, my novels are available only as e-books on Amazon’s Kindle, though I hope to expand to other outlets soon. Getting print versions of my novels out has been a little more complicated, but one day soon I hope to have something on paper that my readers (wherever they are) can hold in their hands.

If you’ve read this book (or any of my other books) feel free to drop a comment!

  • Board denies Jenny McCarthy relevancy for the 20th time.
  • Is it a spool of copper wire or the rings of Saturn? This photo editor isn’t saying.
  • This zygote is tired of other people assuming what it wants.
  • Why you’re bursting into tears all wrong.
  • If you wanna know what the life of a blue jay is like, why don’t you just go ram your head into a plate glass window?
  • “This ain’t your grandfather‘s elbow flange” and other slogans that never took off.
  • You’ve heard of Elf on the Shelf. … But I bet you weren’t ready for me to hand you this subpoena.
  • How to make yourself sexier for the people tapping your phone.
  • Does your girlfriend really care or is she just acting in the way the algorithm wants her to? Take this quiz to find out.
  • Teenagers are so done with this thing they were doing five minutes ago.
  • These people were seeking meaning. Specifically, what does 6-7 mean?
  • How crocodiles upped the ante for this singing talent show.
  • I don’t know about you, but I will watch videos of possums munching bananas all god damn day.
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  • Nation’s uncles confirm: You’re not getting much more life out of that timing belt.
  • Nation’s convention hookers confirm: You don’t have to go back to your room all alone.
  • Nation’s girlfriends want to know: What are you thinking about right now?
  • Canada. Hmmmmm ….
  • A whole family size bag of M&M’s. Hmmmmm …
  • Why people love infrastructure but they’re never in love with infrastructure. 
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Congratulations to me! The 47th album by my musical act Salon de la Guerre has just hit the streaming services, and unlike the somber piano album I unleashed just a week ago, this new one is a bit more upbeat and radio friendly (dare I dream that anybody will play this on a radio).

The latest album is called Carnival and it’s now available for digital download on all the major streaming platforms, including Amazon, Apple Music, Pandora, Bandcamp, YouTube and Spotify.

As I said in a recent blog post, this latest album of upbeat rock and alternative songs is where you get to hear me learn how to play the drums in real time, kind of the way you heard me learn to play piano in previous outings. So you can take that as a nervy statement of purpose or an apology.

See, I never had a real drum set on previous Salon de la Guerre records; instead I’ve turned to drum loops and beats I programmed myself on Logic Pro X, GarageBand or Cubase. Lately, however, I wanted to expand the dimensions of my sound a bit, make the songs sound less mechanical and the production of the songs a bit more “roomy.” And as I said earlier this month, I thought some people out there might reject my music simply because it had no real drums.

What’s my personal experience with drumming? Precious little except by osmosis: I was in marching band in high school and while I didn’t play the drums, my sister did, and I was for a long time on a quest to figure out how the magic of drumrolls went down. I bought a pair of my own drumsticks almost 30 years ago, but I’ve never had anything to beat with them except a few cardboard boxes (I hear the Byrds did that in the beginning). Given the quality of the drum loops on modern software—as well as the fact I don’t have a band or a soundproof room in my apartment, and furthermore that I don’t keep time very well—I largely gave up on the idea of real drums until this last autumn, when a kid told me at a high school open house that there were drum rooms in New York City. I realized I could simply take my laptop and a microphone to one of them and experiment.

I’m happy with the results and think I’ve made a fun work that doesn’t sound like anything I’ve done before. The Stonesy flush of “Drink Mee” (the album’s first “single,” as it were) finds me working even without the help of a metronome, and after hearing what I did on the rhythm track here, I decided to go big with a falsetto vocal. I hope you like that instinct, and if not, I apologize in advance.

The idea again: If I’m keeping it fresh for myself, my gamble is that I’m making it fresh for listeners. You can be the judge.

Lyrically, Carnival is a bit of a party album, but since it’s me and I always try to bring a novelist’s sense of irony and wrongness, there’s always going to be a bit of sour with the sweet. As I say on Bandcamp, “The songs look into feelings of anticipation for festive and better times but also know something about the hangovers that come after the fun.”

Meanwhile, I’ll have to humble-brag a bit: With the release of Carnival, I now have almost 600 songs in circulation online. Yes, you can actually go count them (if you’re doing your due diligence).

The entire album Carnival, like its predecessors, was composed, performed and produced by yours truly at my home studio, except, in this case, for the drum tracks, which were recorded at the Rivington Music Rehearsal Studios in lower Manhattan. All the work was done over the autumn of 2025.

The cover photo is by Susan Daniels.

I hope you enjoy it. Here’s a taste from YouTube:

–*This Mary Tyler Moore hack will help you take a nothing day and make it all seem worthwhile

–*Say goodbye to moldy broads.

–*Sorry, we meant to say moldy boards … cutting boards

–*This Christian OnlyFans model used to be naked AF.

–*“Bitcoin will change your life!” says this guy who now heads a kidnapping ring.

–*To be clear, I don’t own any crypto, says the author of this blog.

–*Your credentials. Why do you care if I have them for a few minutes?

–*This reformed criminal really gets off on telling you how bad he used to be.

–*This reformed porn star is … oops, never mind; she just went back into the business for the third time.

–*This small town theater production of Romeo and Juliet will have you snickering, “It is the East, and Juliet is 41.”

–*This super cool MTA app will let you verify that your train is not fucking coming anytime soon.

–*If we tell you to sniff this app, you will probably sniff it.

–*This nuclear fission cleanse will suck the atoms right out of your face.

–*Are you really calling the person you think you’re calling? Take this Montreal Cognitive Assessment.

–*It’s kind of like a game, Grandpa!

–*This AI algorithm might flatter you a little, but will it let you back in the air lock?

–*Has your mom been replaced by a robot? Take the schizophrenia quiz.

–*This tradwife hopes you’ll be impressed watching her make bread and also shove a rusty spike up her ass.

–*You won’t believe what this beloved TV star from the ’70s looks like today, especially when you realize he died 12 years ago.

–*This AI brings William Holden back to life and he wants absolutely nothing to do with you.

–*Why you’re not thinking through all the things you could be doing with Miracle Whip right now.

–*Your Mom: Have you blamed her enough for your Dad being a piece of shit?

–*Experts say a tall glass of lemonade would sure feel good right now.

–*Jogging in the snow: What are you, stupid?

–*”That guy would have a pissing match with a camel” is one of those insults that just don’t land, Joey.

–*”That guy’s mom is like a camel. Two humps is all you want.” See, that works much better.

–*Bullies: Why haven’t you worked harder to make them like you?

–*This former celebrity now has a regular job like you. And how contemptible is that?

–*Rob Reiner: No, you didn’t deserve him.

Salon de la Guerre is releasing a couple of albums this month. One is a set of rock and pop pieces, but I’ve also got a new collection of piano songs I’ve been working on for the past few months. Half of these are sung songs in the conventional singer-songwriter vein, while five of the songs are classical-music-inspired improvisations. This new album, Everything’s Fine, hits the streams today and you can find it on Apple Music, Amazon, Pandora, YouTube, Bandcamp and Spotify.

I have to apologize for the sound quality on a couple of the songs. As I’ve explained before in other posts, I’m not a trained piano player, and my improvisations are not the kind of things I can easily repeat. When I sit down at the keyboard, I often don’t know whether I’m going to make something wonderful or a piece of dreck, and yet I roll tape anyway and hope for nice surprises. However, that strategy came back to bite me a couple of times this year, especially when I recorded two songs I quite liked while I was also suffering from a raging flu. After I played back these pieces I found that 1) I was extremely proud of what I’d made and 2) you could here sniffing and snorting all over the place. Ugh.

I turned to my software—Goldwave and Logic Pro—to try to get rid of the respiratory background sound effects, and while I succeeded, the sound of these songs got quite muffled. I took a gamble that the nuances and emotion behind the playing would be enough to win my tiny audience over anyway.

I should also note that I while I try not to be treacly or sentimental in my music, a lot of these songs came out on the sad side. Perhaps it’s appropriate since I’ve had some sad news over the last week and perhaps want to wear my heart on my sleeve a little. But I’m hoping to cure the blues when I release a more upbeat album next week called Carnival (which I discussed a few days ago).

I’m including lyrics to the title track of my new album, which is now available on all the major streaming services in digital format only. All the songs were composed and performed this year. Enjoy.

Everything’s Fine
(music and lyrics by Eric R. Rasmussen, copyright 2025)

Everything’s fine
Though the bar is on fire
And the dogs are lapping wine
Everything’s fine

Though the fish they swim in trees
And the whales are in the vines
Everything’s fine

We drink from a hose
And a quack he broke our nose
To look better in the spoon
To make new lovers swoon
But this face is no longer mine
Everything’s fine

Just like somebody’s loss
Is somebody’s gain
I’ll keep my emotions in line
Everything’s fine

A new nose out of reach
And now so is the beach
And we cannot swim there in time
Everything’s fine

You changed your phone number
And now I wait for slumber
In vain on the edge of a dime
Everything’s fine

Your last message was meek
But your morals they were weak
So you packed them up and left them all behind
Everything’s fine

Like a bar that’s on fire
A squirrel fried on a wire
And the vultures are waiting all in line
Everything’s fine

Just like somebody’s loss
Is somebody’s gain
I’ll keep my emotions in line
Everything’s fine

A new nose out of reach
And now so is the beach
And we cannot swim there in time
Everything’s fine



I lost a longtime friend this week. He was the first person to see me drunk. He was also the person who encouraged me to start this blog.

We didn’t agree on many things in our later years, which was very sad, but we forged our young adult identities alongside each other and we stood up for each other as young people … when there were real things at stake. And that can’t be taken away. Those memories can’t be erased. He was also warm and open-hearted when he didn’t have to be. That I’ll also remember.

You can read about John Evan Thomas here.