Beauty is Imperfection

(Originally posted Tuesday, January 29, 2008 )

Good morning! Happy Tuesday. As you go out there this morning, here’s a list of things to consider as you make the choices that shape your life.

1. Every time you listen to Lionel Richie’s “Three Times A Lady,” “Easy,” or “Truly” on the radio, a three-cent mechanical royalty is being paid to help keep Nicole Richie living a life of extravagant dissolution.

2. If every one of you changed out one incandescent light bulb with one fluorescent light bulb, that would be like taking a million cars off the road for a year. Or so say those dirty tree huggers.

3. Every time you look at a picture of Britney Spears in a tabloid or look at her on E! Entertainment News, you are actually helping to create up to $120 million in wealth per year for the U.S. economy. However, you yourself will not be seeing a dime of this. You will mainly be passing it along to scumbags. And meanwhile, it will require that Britney is exploited and hunted and de-humanized, something like Charleton Heston was in “Planet of the Apes.”

4. Remember that every time you watch a TV show on Fox, you are helping redistribute wealth to Rupert Murdoch.

5. If you saved $304 a month at age 35 and started with $50,000 in the bank, you could have a million by the time you reached 65 with stock market returns over time and compound interest. This is what’s called the time value of money. However, if the market crashes the year before you retire, you’re screwed.

6. Remember, whenever you truly love something, ask yourself if somebody with selfish interests is profiting off of that love, whether it’s the love of chocolate, the love of football, the love of sexy singles in your area … or most important, the love of your troops overseas.

7. Remember, a time of great excitement is always followed by a period of the blues, whether it’s the time right after your wedding, or the days after Christmas, post-coital depression, or the first few months after you win the lottery. Don’t be confused by it. It’s just your body getting over the trauma of happiness.

8. Remember, if you eat too big a lunch you’re going to feel gassy and bloated afterward and you won’t get anything done again until 4:30.

9. Remember to create things that you can look back on later with some pride. Write a book. Build a house with your bare hands. Or raise a decent kid. Buying a giant television does not work in this regard. It will only make it worse later.

10. Remember that time is a web spun of your own thoughts and actions. Weave it into something nice.