(Originally posted Friday, December 14, 2007)
–*The Three Gorges Dam Project Will Displace A Million People. Am I One Of Them?
–*Mercury Is Said To Be Harmful To Pregnant Women. How Will This Affect Me If I’m Pregnant and Already Smoking and Drinking?
–*I’m Worried That The Federal Government Knows Everything About the Abortion, the Huff Addiction and the Dog Fucking That I Confided To My MySpace Page
–*The Florida Everglades Was Partially Drained by the Import of an Invidious Thirsty Tree Called the Melaleuca by the U.S. Army at the Turn of the Century. Will the U.S. Army Drain Me of My Fluids?
–*If I Am A Lesbian, Will I Be Killed By My Neighbor’s Well-Trained Canary Island Fighting Dog?
–*Who Took Away All The Mexicans? Am I Next?
–*Why Is My Money Not Doing What It Used To Do? Is It Something I Did?
–*Why Is The Price of My Gas So High? It’s Just a Non-Renewable Resource Of Plant and Animal Tissue, That’s All.
–*Who Is Going To Take Care of Me When I’m Old Unless We Bring Back Arranged Marriages and I Find Large Dowries For My Children?
–*Should I Worry That There Are Contaminants In My Drinking Water Or Rest Easy That Soon There Won’t Be Any More Drinking Water?
–*When My Children Get Big Enough, Will They Try To Kill Me?
–*Shouldn’t I buy a gun to increase my chances of survival in these crazy times, forgetting the fact that I’m far more likely to die from smoking, poor diet and lack of exercise, alcohol consumption, or driving 80 miles per hour in one of those death traps known as an automobile?
–*If I’m Not Sure Who My Enemies Are, Aren’t I Better Off Counting in Potentially Everybody?
Beauty is Imperfection 
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