(Originally posted Sunday, December 16, 2007)
A list of mild and unimportant afflictions we are currently medicating.
–*Restless tongue syndrome
–*Tired ligament syndrome
–*Dormant hangnail disorder
–*Over-attentiveness disorder
–*Angry bursae
–*Porn elbow
–*Idiopathic pissiness disorder
–*Delusional halitosis
–*Postnasal anger
–*Tears that smell like butane
–*Purulent belly-button
–*Ropy eye gowl
–*Congenital pink eye
–*Chronic irritated chilblain
–*Weeping Tourette syndrome
–*Post pyogenic boil lancing stress anxiety
–*Walking scurvy
–*Nantucket summer home toenail necrosis
–*Spotted dick syndrome
–*Easter Island swollen head
–*The Lesser Antilles Rash
–*Christmas mince pie foot abscesses
–*Social anxiety hat-wearing disorder
and
–*Adirondack pee-shyness
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