(Originally posted Wednesday, November 14, 2007)
Top 11 Things That Might Be On Your Butt
11. A mole
10. A wen
9. A keloid
8. A stuck penny
7. A tattoo of Nancy and half of Sluggo, mainly his head and forearms
6. A map of the independent sultanate of Brunei
5. A nest of vipers
4. A golem, the mystical creature in Hebrew folklore, only in this case it is a special golem that hides in your ass crack
3. The impression of somebody’s face, hopefully somebody you like
2. The impression of somebody’s face — more likely somebody from the prison cell you were in
1. Jerry, that rascally talking cartoon dingleberry
Beauty is Imperfection 
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