Archive for June 26th, 2009

–*Busy mourning Farrah Fawcett.

–*Busy mourning Ed McMahon.

–*Going through Michael Jackson’s garbage.

–*Continuing your longstanding Courtney Love suicide vigil.

–*Visiting the petting zoo with your kids when you saw Abe Vigoda and stalked him around the yard until you thought he was going to run away.

–*Sending a death threat to one of the Jonas Brothers because you love them so much and can’t live without them.

–*Trying to get a look inside Michael Jackson’s house.

–*Trying to break into Michael Jackson’s house.

–*Trying to curl up in Michael Jackson’s house.

–*Giving Axl Rose special anal-tongue contact called the “Munich Police Force.”

–*Having a bowl of niacin and riboflavin enriched Wheaties.

–*Tracking blood through the snow to see dying Uncle Vanya in St. Petersburg

–*Trying to make some sense of my life and having it occur to me all of a sudden that Michael Jackson might have the answer.


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