(Originally posted Thursday, October 25, 2007)
Things Eight-Year-Olds Say After Hearing Adults Say Them Without Knowing What They Mean
“Hey dad, I’m bringing sexy back.”
“Don’t you judge me!”
“Mommy. You are such a dolt.”
“That dress really works for you.”
“You’re not my type.”
“You’re not the woman I fell in love with.”
“You’re just using me to get to her.”
“I don’t drink box wine.”
“Well, nobody said life was fair.”
“Did you hear how great The Fantastic Four’s opening weekend box office was?”
“This is my fight and I’m going to finish it my way.”
“It’s just too soon for homosexual marriage in this country.”
“I don’t know if I could love you like I did him.”
“I like a fine cigar.”
“There are a lot of unanswered questions about Kennedy’s killing.”
“You really know how to hurt.”
“I’m a bit of a loner. And hard to get to know.”
“Only gay people like Bette Midler.”
“Sex when you’re in love is better.”
“Let’s get real, okay.”
“You aren’t man enough to stay.”
“You shouldn’t blame yourself.”
“Europe needs to get its shit together.”
“I don’t think Gore really wanted to win.”
“We must stabilize the region.”
“I don’t like mock-Tudor.”
“I don’t believe in God.”
“Well, isn’t this a fine mess?”
“It’s all up to me now.”
“I can tell when you’re faking.”
“Speak well of me when I’m gone.”
“I hate drama.”
Beauty is Imperfection 
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