Beauty is Imperfection

• Board denies Jenny McCarthy relevancy for the 20th time.
• Is it a spool of copper or the rings of Saturn? This photo editor isn’t saying.
• This zygote is tired of other people assuming what it wants.
• Why you’re bursting into tears all wrong.
• If you wanna know what the life of a blue jay is like, why don’t you just go ram your head into a plate glass window?
• “This ain’t your grandfather‘s elbow flange” and other slogans that never took off.
• You’ve heard of Elf on the Shelf. … But I bet you weren’t ready for me to hand you this subpoena.
• How to make yourself sexier for the people tapping your phone.
• Does your girlfriend really care or is she just acting in the way the algorithm wants her to? Take this quiz to find out.
• Teenagers are so done with this thing they were doing five minutes ago.
• These people were seeking meaning. Specifically, what does 6-7 mean?
• How crocodiles upped the ante for this singing talent show.
• I don’t know about you, but I will watch videos of possums munching bananas all god damn day.
• Teenage inventor invents tongue kissing.
• Nation’s uncles confirm: You’re not getting much more life out of that timing belt.
• Nation’s convention hookers confirm: You don’t have to go back to your room all alone.
• Nation’s girlfriends want to know: What are you thinking about right now?
• Canada. Hmmmmm ….
• A whole family size bag of M&M’s. Hmmmmm …
• Why people love infrastructure but they’re never in love with infrastructure. 
• Why you’re sexually fetishizing firefighters all wrong.
• Why hasn’t the retro industry brought back outhouses yet?

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