–*You’ll never guess how this kitten lost all his money.
–*Everyone but you is wearing their phones on the sides of their heads.
–*What Marie Osmond’s teeth look like today is insane!
–*This woman put what in where?
–*You didn’t love possums, so look what they did to your house.
–*See what happened when this man tried to take a bath in bitcoins.
–*This guy had a drill and you know exactly what happened to his hand.
–*This guy had a gun and you know exactly what happened to everyone around him.
–*This man used an anti-pirate slur. Look what the pirates did to him.
–*Ewwww! A pile of greasy pennies!
–*This actress stepped away at the height of her career and that’s why her name is completely baffling to you.
–*We kept asking this 93-year-old woman if sex is really over for her.
–*Could this headline launch a “stuff the doorknob in your mouth” challenge?
–*This man tried to own Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. It backfired.
–*Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez got into a car. It backfired.
–*This guy lives in a state with lots of gun owners. He hopes what he just heard was car backfire.
–*After this cleanse, your body will collapse into a heap of skin.
–*Travelectomy says your appendix will most likely explode in these cities.
–*I’m going to win the lottery, said this statistical illiterate.
–*You won’t get pregnant if I pull out on time said this statistical illiterate.
–*New York is a crime ridden sewer, say these statistical illiterates.
Beauty is Imperfection 
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