Beauty is Imperfection

(Originally posted Thursday, December 04, 2008 )

What super powers do everyday humans have that are much envied by Martians?

–*We can jump up on the air, not touching the ground for a small period of time.

–*We have long muscles called tongues that shoot out of our mouths by an inch or more, depending on how nimble we are.

–*We can shoot pockets of air out of our mouths or from between our buttocks.

–*We talk in a highly sophisticated system of signs and sounds called language that allows us to facilitate action and make people do what we want through persuasion rather than by hitting them with a stick

–*We can fart under our arms

–*Our visual, auditory, gastrointestinal, respiratory and urogenital systems are all covered in thick protective mucus.

–*We can produce saliva and spit it as far as a few yards.

–*Some of us produce food in the form of milk. The female some of us.

–*We have opposable thumbs

–*We can scream

–*We can give birth

–*We can produce the music of Kenny G, which causes an overwhelming sensation in Martians that makes them die